It wasn’t a desperate kind of yes, but a yes of deep understanding that the me that felt broken and beat down at a soul level and who had made the decisions that got me into the mess I was in wouldn’t be the me that could turn things around unless I got some help. Like, A LOT of help.

Maybe it was the hope that these programs represented for me that pushed me to the back of the room where I plunked down my credit cards to pay for the programs. 

I literally felt like throwing up, I was so scared....